I'm going to tell you people about my day, and you will fucking listen to me. Today was a much better day than yesterday. Yesterday I felt like dying. I was seriously freaking out... a lot. But it was all worked out, and I'm calm now. I'm not good. I'm not bad. I'm just calm... It's amazing how one thing can effect 1000 more. One thing can go wrong, and it can change you're whole year. One mistake can change your world. But then to balance that, one good thing can change your world back. It seems that the later is a harder thing to do though. Why is it that it is so much easier to bring people down than to help them up? It is so easy for people to think negative things about themselves, and so hard for them to believe the positive things. I don't know what it is about the human race, why we are all so negative. I think that in the end, everything balances out. For every good thing, there is a bad. Every good trait someone has, there is a bad trait. People tell you that it is wrong to hate, but without hate, would love really be as special? If we are supposed to love our enemies, then what does that say about love? It takes away all meaning from the word.
People tell me all the time that I'm a good person, why can't I see it? Why, no matter how hard I try, can't I see that I'm not worthless? Everything that I ever try and do I fail at. All except a few things. The only things that I can do are draw, sing, and according to some of you, write. Three things, what a big accomplishment. I can do three things right. Where is the balance in that? Three things can't possibly make up for my lack of social graces, my inability to cooperate, my high expectations of others and myself, my paranoia, my rudeness. Oh well, I guess I'm just an abnormality of the world. I'm just a spare part, an extra piece of puzzle that no one knows what to do with.
About Me
- InkAndVomit
- I never know what to say about myself.. Because every time I say my opinion about who I am, I'm told that it isn't true.. Don't ask how that works.. But here are some facts. My mind is pretty fucked up.. that may be a good or bad thing.. Depends who you are. I'm not very social.. I hate people with a passion. I'm not the most coperative person. I like to debate. And I would like to think that I'm fairly deep. So... I guess some of those were opinions.. but facts in a way too...
3 comments:
Well I think you have a good point I mean yeah everyone can be pretty neg except one person I know that Ive never really seen neg. He is very religous. Im sure ur good at alot more then you think. Im not really good at much myself. And so what if ur only good at three things. Shit what do I have I can kinda play halo good half the time. Shit idk wtf Im good at really. I guess I can be a good friend at times. But then I can be an asshole. I dont have much for talents. Anyways ur no spare part to me. Ur one of the main components in my engine lol idk Like you mean alot to me and ur not somethen that is just extra in my life.
Well I think you're just different... and you just refuse to see everything else that's makes you a great person. Like seriously, you are.
You're always down on yourself for no real reason and this causes you to think that you're worthless when it isn't true at all.
I love ya'.
Hey there. Thanks for your comment on my blog. I know what you mean, I think negative stuff about myself too. For a long time I was in a rut with that.
But I'm getting better lately. The biggest thing that helps me is just doing more things with other people, and opening up to them. The more active I am, the less time or desire I have to criticize myself, and the better I feel. Then the bad feelings just fade into the background. I stop thinking about my faults, and just accept them. And I see the good in myself again.
About my post you commented on, I can't blame you for your reaction. What I wrote sounded pretty obnoxious. But those were my honest feelings at the time.
I wish you happiness.
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